When your senior parent has Alzheimer’s or another form of dementia and no longer knows who you are, that can make visiting them and spending time with time emotionally difficult. But as your senior loved one’s dementia progresses spending good moments with them becomes even more important, because that’s a way for the two of you to connect. Having companion care at home services is useful when you can not be there.
If you want to spend time with your senior parent who no longer remembers you are their child, there are some things that you can do to make the experience easier and more fulfilling for both of you like:
Use Their Name
When you enter the room where your senior loved one is don’t expect them to know you. Greet them by name as you walk into the room and offer your hand. Speak warmly and confidently. By using their name and speaking warmly you are offering a clue to them that the two of you know each other and that you are someone that they like and who likes them. When you offer your hand to them, you are making a physical connection to reassure them. If your senior loved one has a companion care at home provider don’t have the companion care at home provider introduce you. Instead just greet them by name yourself and start the conversation.
When you sit down with them don’t start off the conversation by asking if they remember you or know who you are. Assume they don’t. Instead, steer the conversation. Immediately give them a compliment on something tangible. You might say that you love the color or pattern on their shirt, or you really like their festive socks, or you think that the earrings they are wearing are very pretty. By giving them a compliment on something tangible that they can see and be aware of you are orienting them in the conversation.
Bring Something To Talk About With You
Make sure that you bring some object with you that you can both talk about. Make it something simple. A scarf is a great item to bring because you can say present the scarf and comment on the lovely color or the nice pattern which invites your senior loved one to comment on it also. That establishes a warm bond between you. Clothing items are usually the best things to bring like scarves or jackets or sweaters. But, you can also bring a picture, a figurine, or anything that has some characteristics that you can comment on.
Stay In The Moment
The brief conversation that you have with your senior loved one may not be exactly what you were hoping for. They won’t know you, and you won’t be able to feel that connection with them as your mother or father, or as your grandfather or grandmother. But you will get to share a warm moment and they will get to have a great experience with you and that’s what really matters.